Cost per sex

I carefully consider decisions that I make, something my wife, Allie, doesn’t do very well. As you know, Allie has had multiple affairs now and I am weighing the options of staying or leaving her. She is repentant and remorseful now, but it is not a foregone conclusion that I will stay married to her.

I was thinking about how much the sex cost Mark, Allie’s affair partner. Mark’s wife Carrie is divorcing him and she filed on May 1st, 2018. I am writing this on the 19th of May.

Allie reports that they had sex four times. Almost five, but Allie says she couldn’t go through with it the first time they met up. Twice Mark bought and paid for a hotel room with cash. Let’s say that cost him $130.00 with tax.  That’s $260.00 so far. Allie says she insisted that he wear a condom. So, unless he bought the value pack, that’s about $13.00.

The other three times, Allie says that they had sex in her car. That’s nice huh.  I get to ride around in that car and think about that crap.

Anyway, Mark is up to $273.00 for four times.  That’s about $68.00 per encounter.

But, like I said, Carrie is divorcing Mark. Mark and Carrie own their home outright. It is worth about $450,000.  (I am a Realtor and can look that shit up)

Carrie hasn’t worked since they got married nearly 20 years ago. They have four children. Three are minors. Thus, Mark is gonna be paying 100% of their care and child support. That will probably be about $2,000 per month. Sure, he was already paying that, but they were married. Now, he’s gonna be paying that while not being married.  If he wants to have a new relationship in the future, he will still be paying that and probably for another woman too. Expensive.

Carrie will get maintenance and/or alimony. That amount will have to do with 1/2 of Mark’s remodeling business. If he’s clearing $150,000 per year (wild guess), then she’ll get about $5,000-6,000 monthly.  Yep.  She gets half of the egghead’s income because that’s how it works here.

So, let’s just take a year at $7,000 per month.  That’s $84,000.  Plus $225,000 on the house and the couple hundred bucks he spent on the hotel and condoms.  Probably looking at $309,000 thousand dollars.

Divide that by the four times they had sex and you’re looking at about $77,000 per episode.  That’s a lot of dough.  How much is my wife’s vagina worth? I mean, she’s great and all but $77k per?  Yeah no.

Let’s say that he doesn’t have to pay that much in alimony and child support. All in, let’s assume he sends Carrie $4,000 monthly. Still sitting at $48,000 for the first year + half of the house. That’s $273,000 or about $70,000 bucks per fuck. That’s a lot of dough.

I get it. People are unhappy in their marriages. But just go tell your wife you’re unhappy. Still costs you money to get divorced, but when you commit adultery here in Idaho, the faithful spouse has you by the balls.

 

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