As you know, I caught my wife in her second affair in March (2018). The question of should I stay or go is haunting me daily, hourly, by the minute. My wife is now a repeat cheater. She has exhibited a pattern or a cycle. Perhaps it is an addiction. Maybe it’s a mental disorder. I am not sure. Several things that experts know about multiple affairs.
- People who have multiple affairs have never gotten to the core issue that they brought into the marriage
- People who have multiple affairs often say “it just happened” and “I never saw it coming”
- People who have multiple affairs are in cyclical patterns. Now that I have had a long history with her, I am seeing those cycles play out.
- People who have multiple affairs will likely repeat the pattern unless they put a ton of effort into healing from those core issues.
- People who have multiple affairs truly believe their own remorse. They believe their own apology is sincere and they believe that they will NOT do it again.
- People who have multiple affairs NEVER get professional help or NEVER get the appropriate professional help that helps them heal.
So, with all of that, we MIGHT have a chance IF Allie is willing to put in some long, hard work on herself. You see I am NOT to BLAME for her cheating. It is hers. She owns it and she has to face the issues head on. She has to be willing to do whatever it takes to heal from this. As a busy mom, there is huge concern that she will ever find the time to make progress.